Return to Zork

“Want some rye? ‘Course you do!” If that line triggers PTSD, congrats: you’ve played Return to Zork. This not-quite-sequel turns the beloved text adventure into a full-motion-video extravaganza, complete with awkward acting, bizarre logic puzzles, and enough Zorkian weirdness to fill a Grue’s pantry. You’ll photograph goats, talk to creepy villagers, and get insulted by your inventory. It’s like Myst had a baby with Twin Peaks after bingeing Infocom manuals. A cult classic—or possibly a cult recruitment video. Either way, you won’t forget it. Whether that’s a blessing or a curse is up to you.